Lucasfilm announces “Adult” Star Wars Novel Line


Today Lucasfilm announced the licensing of a new line of “Adult” Star Wars novels.

“While the movies were still an ongoing project, it was important to portray all aspects of the Star Wars universe as wholesome family entertainment,” said Lucasfilm spokesmen Dirk Merdespieler. “However, now that the cycle of films is done, we can finally broaden the Star Wars franchise into marketing niches we’d heretofore avoided, and adult entertainment is at the top of our list.”

One of the first new licenses was awarded to longtime Star Wars novel publisher Del Rey Books, who will be putting out a line of Star Wars adult novels. Del Rey announced that the first book in the line would be Slave Girl of Tattoine by Barry Malzberg and Mike Resnick.

“Yeah, Barry and I had an old porn novel called Arab Slave Harem we’d never managed to sell, and it was pretty easy to alter so it fit in the Star Wars universe,” said Resnick when the two authors were reached for comment.

In the background, Malzberg could be heard laughing maniacally as he typed away at the updated manuscript.

“Instead of an Arab slave caravan, she gets captured by the Sand People and sold to Jabba the Hutt.”

“Hahaha! Banthas!” exclaimed Malzberg.

“Anyway, after some 200 pages she gets rescued by a young Luke Skywalker. All in all, its probably the easiest $50,000 Barry and I ever made.”

Del Rey’s publicist indicated that they were willing to look beyond traditional adult themes, and were willing to pay top dollar for works to fill what were previously considered niche markets. As proof, she cited the hiring of Pulitzer Prize winner E. Annie Proulx to pen Brokeback Falcon, a novel which explores the forbidden love between Han Solo and Chewbacca.

“The Star Wars universe is almost 30 years old,” said Merdespieler. “It’s high time our fans learned there’s more to life than comic books and action figures.” (via Locus)


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