Toys and Gadgets – Here Be Monsters

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I have taken upon my shoulders the mantle of all things weird and sexy, because you can’t spell uncanny valley without U CAN! Also I’m an unrepentant hedonist.

My love for the weird side of all things sexy and nerdy, and my need to share it with you, is kind of like an alien possession, as though the dark tentacles of the internet have reached out and implanted its moist, gelatinous oddities in me–and if that’s the kind of thing that gets you going, you’ll love Primal Hardwere‘s Ovipositors. Yes, now you too can live out your fantasy of getting impregnated by our alien overlords. They’re also happy to supply your need for recreational tentacles and other fantastical creature features.

One of my favorite purveyors of such wears/weres/wares, however, is Bad Dragon. Focusing, as the name suggests, on dragon-inspired danglies, they’re also more than happy to indulge your desire for unnatural knowledge of creatures such as werewolves, dinosaurs, and more! Even better, each toy is accompanied by an illustration, a bit of background, and the ability (in most cases) for customization. They work hard to put the sci-fi in your fantasy, if you know what I mean.

I’ll be honest folks, finding SFW photos from these sites is not an easy task–but hey look! Some harmless tentacles and creature eggs, and a wicked wyvern who’s cautiously cropped.

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