Sex and Chess (with Eggplant)


sex n chess eggplant camWhen I saw a cam girl named sexNchess was online, I assumed that perhaps her performances involved some sort of strip chess playing. What I found was even more unusual. She is honestly one of the most traditionally beautiful girls I’ve ever seen, not just on cam, but in any media. She says she prefers Darren Aronofsky films and services she offers involve math tutoring and bouts of Starcraft and Diablo.

I’ve been surfing with her room in the background for a while and I’m not sure she actually takes off her clothes on cam. Her profile seems to indicate that she used to, but she no longer does because she is mad that Romney lost. I’m guessing some of this may be satirical. Her pet “baby fox” looks a lot like just a really cute puppy to me. sexNchess says she is paying off her undergrad and grad school expensive educations with camming and, based on the way she writes cogently and thoughtfully, and the way she complains about paying off those student loans, I believe her. She also has a bookcase with actual books on it and a football game playing in the background and she is playing music ranging from Zac Brown to Perfect Circle.

She has been brandishing an eggplant for some time. Earlier, she explained: “I’m writing a song called I want to fuck you with an eggplant!” People keep asking her if she is going to do the eggplant, as her chat room promises an eggplant show. sexNchess says she was on a cruise ship once and she found some extra eggplants in the kitchen. So she did what anyone would do and stretched condoms over each of them and scattered them throughout the boat for other people to discover. I have a dinner engagement, so email and let me know if sexNchess ever does do anything extreme with her menacing purple vegetable.

Name: sexNchess
CamScore: 9808.6
Gender: Female
Weight: 115 pounds
Height: 65 inches
Age: 22
City: Mount Gay, Glorious US of A
Country: United States
Sexual Preference: Straight
Marital Status: Divorced
Occupation/Major: Free Agent
School/College: Graduate School – Ivory Tower
Favorite Food: Coors Light
Pets: baby fox
Car: Toyota Tacoma
About Me: telling it on the mountain here:
Before the presidential election of 2012, iTN used to get naked and drink exorbitant amounts of alcohol – nearly every day. The days were golden and things were about to get booming on Mount Gay, Colorado. After the unfortunate loss to BO, the candidate less capable of getting the economy back on track, iTN made the difficult decision to lay off her stunt doubles. The reactions have been mixed among Mount Gay citizens, though the liberals have made it clear that they will rage in protest whenever possible.

iTN, in hopes of understanding the erratic behavior of her opposition, decided to adopt her own sense of entitlement and since has begun refusing to provide the entertainment her followers demand. She can now be found sitting at her desk with everything left to be desired, to much of practically the entire internet’s dismay.

These people – they want a whole lot but tend to be reluctant when anything is asked of them. iTN would have been upset about this, but realized that the overwhelming unconditional positive regard demonstrated in her room by Intrinsic Motivation advocates (unparalleled on this website) was worth all the trouble caused by the jobless folks watching her from the public libraries. In times of desperation, tips ‘for the hell of it’ have proven to be the most rewarding of all and continue to provide catalysts for classic iTradeNaked action.
Tags: happy, turkey show, stripper pole, excel goddess, republican, climbs out windows when drunk, facade, beer bong, brunette, tv over couch, goat painting, long hair, chess, perspective, dancer, crystal ball
My Favorite Models: sexNchess
Interests & Hobbies
Meaning of Life: I’m writing a book about it
Five Things I Can’t Live Without: my baby fox, Apple, internet and wifi, food, sleep
Favorite Books: Freakonomics, Nine Stories, The Doors of Perception and Heaven & Hell, God Bless You Mr. Rosewater
What I Like To Do For Fun:
ride roller coasters and drive at astronomical speeds, with my eyes closed…basically anything that doesn’t involve taking my trash out or pumping my own gas.
Favorite Songs: Elton John, Crystal Method, Nirvana, Pixies, Deftones, Alkaline Trio, Citizen Cope, Nine Inch Nails, Fugazi, Kanye West, The Clash, Joy Division, Supertramp, OK Go, Drake, My Bloody Valentine, Ray Charles, Radiohead
Favorite Movies: American History X, Synecdoche NY, Wall Street I/II, any Darren Aronofsky film
Craziest Thing I’ve Ever Done: can’t say on here
If I Could Be Anywhere Right Now: snuggling and watching the news
Hobbies: dancing, chess, sailing, fishing, gardening, hiking, skiing, reading, writing, studying, cooking, trading naked, being a lush, fine dining
Talents: vertical and horizontal aerial movement on pole, beer bongs, making people smile
Perfect Mate: someone who can help
Perfect Date: someone who will listen
Turn Ons: funny, smart, polite, talkative, interesting, tokens
Best Reason to Get to Know Me: when I was 19 i used to take a bus on the east coast to Chinatown. I don’t know what I was searching for, I just know I never found it. I don’t expect to find it here either. people tell me all the time ‘I don’t think you’re meant for this’ and they are probably right. when I wake up in the morning I fix myself a bowl of cereal and watch CNBC from my bed. when you wake up day after day with a headache, and eventually find that a tree had been cut down in your front yard, you know it’s time to tone it down. I don’t want to wake up with the same headache anymore, and I shouldn’t have to wake up and discover that a tree is missing from the yard; I just want to have a normal day, and at the end of it I just want to have dinner and go to bed. wake up and see Peyton Manning on TV and the Tigers in the World Series… in perspective you realize that life is just too short to have to spend every morning trying to figure out what went wrong the night before. eventually it is time to hang it up. one day I will sign off for good and I can’t promise that it will be drawn out or even be expected. there are no good or bad things in life, only things, and I expect that the reactions will vary. and then you’ll have to find someone else, but you’ll never find another.


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