Smurf Porn

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Okay, I don’t think there is really lots of smurfporn online. But I’ll give you what I’ve got.

If you inexplicably happen to have access to ColecoVision’s smurfy video game Gargamel’s Castle, there is an easter egg in it: Leave the room at the last screen with Smurfette and the skull and the little blue blonde will drop her dress. For those of you who do not recall, Gargamel the sorcerer and his evil cat Azrael were the arch nemeses of the Smurfs. Smurfette was the girl. The only girl. Fire up your gang bang and homosexuality puns now, folks.

If you want to read some special fiction, there is an old story from the old alt.sex.stories archived at hoboes. It is called The Sexual Adventures of the Smurfs and involves an annual orgy. You may be able to get more insight into the secret lives of Smurfs by reading The Unauthorized Guide to Smurfs around the World, but probably not.

If you translate SexyFandom into smurfese, with the Websmurfer it looks smurfily like this.

I suppose I should not be so smurfily unsavory about these esteemed collectibles, but according to the Smurf Name Generator, I am Cujo Smurf so I think I am supposed to be like this.

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