True Blood – We’ll Meet Again For Realz

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All right, now that I got my cable back, thanks Comcast…, we can get on with this mess of a show. Enough with the orgin stories! This isn’t compelling story telling cuz apparently these characters have always been exactly the same! The only person who has changed on this show was that old dead witch, into a ghost. That’s it! Otherwise, there is no growth, there’s just some shit that happened before and some shit will happen again.

Like my husband says, “Blacula don’t crackula”. Hey look! It’s Tara’s new orgin story!

Has there been a single episode where Sookie doesn’t cry? Damn she’s ugly when she cries.

Eric returns to Fangtasia and is a total dick to Pammy. Like Pam would ever betray that sweet, sweet ass. If it wasn’t Pam, and Eric and Bill didn’t do it, doesn’t that just leave Alcide?

Sam’s horsey buddies show up at the bar cuz they’re weirdo swingers. Ugh, you know how you’ve got those friends, or those friends of friends who just weird you out with their creepy vibe? That’s them.

Werewolf Magoo lies his ass off to cover for Sookie cuz…. Why does he care about her? I don’t get it. There are hotter chicks in that town! I bet her friends in high school called her Crazy Pussy. Cuz she’s crazy, but everyone wants to screw her.

Oh no! My car’s possessed!! Bwahahaha are you fucking kidding me?! What is this? Herbie Strikes Back?

Yay more flashbacks! Zomg more orgin stories. This army billshit is just too much. Someone took some madlibs and decided to make an episode out of it.

Yes, Jessica. Whatever you say, Jessica. I will obey. Now take your shirt off.

What does it mean when Eric releases Pam? The Hubs says “I dunno, some made up vampire bullshit”. Why doesn’t he write these reviews?

Oh boy another trip to faerie land. I’m glad all those dancers got a pay check but this is some lame ass shit. Is there a point here?

Sookie shouldn’t be drinking, that’s bad for the baby. Isn’t that nice of Alcide to lie for her. How can she ever repay him? Start licking those balls!

Horsey friends are dead! Oh no!

Tara goes lesbo again!

I called it! Kill the kid vampire cuz that’s the grossest think that could happen and that’s the shows number one priority these days.

If this turns into some kind of vampire faerie war imma have a real problem.

So this episode was lame. Predicable things happened, it was boring, Salome is totally behind all the crap with the Authority. I’m not paying attention to that storyline because it is dumb. At least the preview for next week makes it look like something will actually happen. Other than a car getting possessed! BWAHAHAHAHA.




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