Revolution – Chained Heat

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You named this episode “Chained Heat”? Seriously? What is this, a lesbian, jail themed porno? I would have much preferred to watch that than this weak ass second offering of NBC’s post-apocalypse show.

Dear NBC, if you’re going to offer a show like this it needs more of a hook than some blonde chick with a dumb crossbow. Where do I even start. You’ve got a lot of competition in this field and if can’t just be about crappy people being shitty to each other. If I wanted that I’d still be reading The Walking Dead. Yeah, I said it. No one cares why the elctricity went off, everyone seems like they are doing pretty well. Sure there is some psycho militia in charge of stuff, but it doesn’t look like anyone is starving and everything is on fire. So what’s the point? WHERE is the story?

This show is like Jericho but without any kind of plot. At least in Jericho bombs went off and there was a clear conspiracy theory happening. Revolution is obviously hinting to that but they are pussy footing so hard that it doesn’t even register when you’re watching. Oh no some bad guy named Randall is coming after Computer Lady! What is this, The Stand? Where’s Corin Nemec?!

And can we talk about that crossbow? Dude, even a regular bow would make more sense than a goddamn frigging crossbow that is slow to reload, bulky and heavy. Bitch can’t even put it in her back pack! She’s always carrying it!

I can see what the writers are trying to set in motion but it’s so very predictable that I don’t have time to tell you I’m psychic every week (True Blood I’m looking at you). I might check in halfway through the season, but if Revolution survives the whole season, I’ll be surprised.

And Charlie looks like a Bajoran when she wrinkles her nose like that.




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